Cracks in the shell
by dhalpin3
Summary: Author's note: Just what did the Cuckoos mentally see after Illyana first returned from Limbo after her initial struggle with Dormmanu (Uncanny X-Men #3 and 4)? The initial confrontation with Dormmanu appeared to have change how Illyana viewed her companions and how she thought. Some of the references in this story are tied to my prior story Snowflake on Ice. Major update.
1. Chapter 1

**Cracks in the Shell**

Author's note: Just what did the Cuckoos mentally see after Illyana first returned from Limbo after her initial struggle with Dormmanu (Uncanny X-Men #3 and 4)? The initial confrontation with Dormmanu appeared to have changed how Illyana viewed her companions and how she thought.

Some of the references in this story are tied to my prior story Snowflake on Ice. See the story There are no snowflakes in hell for Illyana's 2.0's creation.

5/29/15 I've updated this story with a what actually happened when Dormmanu tried to end Illyana.

**Part 1: **

Earlier Illyana had abruptly vanished then moments later had reappeared. Instead of her usual teleportation disks of light she had reappeared upside down four feet in the air surrounded by flames and red blazing ghostly images of bones and demon heads. Illyana took a hard fall landing on her side, blazing images and fire still surrounding her.

Everybody was rather freaked out, especially the newest member, code name Golden Balls; a nickname he was desperately trying to avoid. Illyana got to her knees and then stood up, the burning fire and burning images finally fading away. Illyana brushed off questions about what had just happened and fled to her room in a panic.

**Flashback: **

Illyana was held by two demons while Dormmanu's finger embedded itself mystically in Illyana's abdomen. This caused Illyana to cry out in pain, more from the spiritual disruption then any actual physical pain; although seeing a giant finger thrust into you is quite disturbing in itself.

Why was Dormmanu doing this? The disruption of Limbo was spilling over into his domain, causing mounting damage and disruption. Dormmanu was acting in his own perceived self defense. The threat had to be eliminated, thus his bid to take over Limbo and his summoning of Illyana to Limbo.

Dormmanu damned her, damned her with everything he had.

Dormmanu is one those creatures that always had more power and cunning then actual intellectual depths. For most magical entities this approach would have worked.

Should have worked.

But Illyana was not like most entities.

Just how do you damn somebody with all that you have? This wasn't your average magic zap. Dormmanu understood something about Illyana that others, and Illyana herself, did not know. He understood how Illyana's powers were broken and what he believed it would lead to; and to he acted to end her.

Illyana 2.0 had regained what was left of Illyana 1.0's soul. However it was not fully integrated. She was layered, unmixed. The soul was changing her, influencing her, but she was still very much not Illyana 1.0 in actions and in thoughts.

Dormmanu's power compressed the essence of Illyana. Her soul, her mind, her powers. All was squeezed together like a runaway stellar collapse. In an instant Dormmanu achieved what would have taken years, if ever. The layering was gone, crushed into a hard dense core hovering on extinction. Illyana mind had only one thought was left as she endured the agony.

_**"NO"!**_

The stellar collapse is a good analogy. Only in the indescribable heat and compression can certain elements be made, can certain components be truly fused together to create something new. To achieve ignition. To ignite incandescence.

To reach final unity between the demonic and the soul.

The power surged out of Illyana, flinging Dormmanu away. Dormmanu looked up from where he had been flung to behold Illyana reborn, blazing with power and rage. His plan had gone wrong, horribly wrong. Instead of destroying her he had fused her together. He had made the problem worse (or so he believed).


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2: **

Hours later Illyana had just teleported Scott, Emma, the Cuckoos, and Angle to the new school. Just after the teleport Illyana had screamed in agony and the strange flames had reappeared around her. Again she fled to her room.

The Cuckoos looked at each other, mentally and physically, and took a mental look-see at Illyana. They were surprised to find that her shields were gone. Illyana's mental shields had always been the toughest ever encountered by any telepath. No telepath, not even Xavier, had ever come close to reading her mind unless she allowed it. Most mental shields are visualized as a stone or iron wall when viewed allegorically at certain mental visualizations. The strength of the wall being relative to the mental strength of the person attempting to shield their mind.

In the allegorical framework, a telepath trying to gain access would attempt to breach the wall by finding a crack, visualize a door in the wall, or just blast it down. Such approaches did not work with Illyana. Her allegorical wall, as it were, was a distant endless gray field of mist with no reference point. A telepath would find themselves hovering in air with the indistinct grey going on infinitely in all directions. No matter where the telepath tried create a reference point the grey was forever out of reach. An endless horizon; with no point of reference or indication of scale. You did not know if you were conceptually five feet from the surface or five million miles. No one knew how Illyana created such a complete and absolute block and Illyana never explained to any telepath who asked. Interestingly this block was active while both awake, asleep, and unconscious so the source of the block was likely partially magic related.

One rather nasty side affect, for a telepath, was that Illyana could completely vanish from a telepath's mental sight whenever she wished. This could be very disconcerting as all telepaths come to rely upon the sensing of mental emanation as a kind of second sight or sound. Having such ability allows you just know that somebody is in the living room before you walk into it. Many telepaths were frequency surprised to find Illyana in a room that they thought was empty as they over relied upon their mental sense.

This mental blind spot combined with the inability to read Illyana's mind made her unconformable to most telepaths. In addition, Illyana 2.0 always felt odd mentally when Illyana was not attempting to block the ability to sense her presence. With mental sensing alone a telepath would feel a large indistinct dark presence. Think of ominous music playing in a horror film. This presence tended to creep out most telepaths, as their eyes would show an attractive young woman while their mental sense would project an entity whose size was much larger but indistinct and hidden.

But at this moment all the shielding were gone. Illyana's mind was wide open.

The Cuckoos cautiously took a cursory look. The mental picture was one of Illyana sitting upon an endless field of gray dusty ground. The sky was a deep blue to black, almost dark. No sun is visible. Illyana's soul sword is on the ground in front of her. She is just staring at the ground looking somewhat sad and concerned. Circling in front of her, over her sword, are various spheres. The spheres represent various memories that she is examining.

One sphere shows a young girl playing on a farm.

One shows what had just happened on her initial fight with Dormmanu.

Another keeps changing as it shows various people and events from her past (Peter, Kitty, Lockheed, New Mutants).

The final one is shows two images replaying over and over; one side showing Illyana 1.0 death/suicide in closing limbo, the other showing her resurrection/creation/torture by Belasco.

The Cuckoos dipped into her thoughts. Illyana has two main two main thought streams going. The first was mostly just emotional. Raw fear and terror overlaid with an endless panicked chanting _"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap..."_. The other thought stream was Illyana trying to make sense of what was happening to her.

_"That was not possible"._

_"I'm not possible"._

_"I should be dead, why am I not dead"?_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_"I was summoned , summoned like some enslaved demon"._

_"I was bound, he had me, then he killed me, but it didn't work"._

_"It's just like when Belasco created me"._

_"Did he create me"?_

_"Did he resurrect me without a soul or am I something totally different"?_

_"What am I, how am I"?_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_"Everything's different, what happened, why do I feel this way"?_

_"By the abyss I feel, feel so much, so scared"._

_"I want my brother, I want to just run and hide"._

_"Want my brother, want him want him want him"._

_"Not worthy of his love, not worthy, No No No, not worthy"!_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_"Limbos broken, how is that possible"?  
"Crumbling, it's crumbling, just like me"._

_"Broken, I'm broken just like the others, my powers aren't working right"._

_"How is that even possible"?_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_'Not fair, not fair. I felt so good, first time ever, not fair not fair not fair "._

_"A hell lord, everything he had, didn't work, what does that mean"?_

_"No one to help me, no one to care, what to do, what what WHAT"!_

_"All my friends gone. Oh Gods what have I been doing"?_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_"Dormmanu took limbo, summoned me, tried to kill me, did not work"._

_"What am I"?_

_"Yana"!_

_I'm Yana!. No I was Darkchilde. Was. Now I am me"?_

_"All. All that he had and it didn't work"!_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_"Then She was here, but she wasn't really,, it was still just me"._

_"Transcendent rage and hate fleshed in a burning form"._

_"What was that? What was I"?_

_"What am I"?_

_"Should have died, didn't die. There are worse things then dying, no No No NO"_

_"OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

_"Felt so good to hurt him, sword was a burning icon of rage, felt good"_

_"Hate Him, hate him. Not again, no not again. Shards not that AGAIN"!_

_"Run run run run run, never stop running"._

_"No where to run, nowhere to hide. Alone"._

_OhCrap OhCrap OhCrap"._

The Cuckoos retreated from the thought streams. Illyana was different, no longer just the Darkchilde aspect of Illyana 1.0 who had gained three fifths of the former Illyana's soul. Now just pure Illyana.

As the Cuckoos turned to answer Mrs. Frosts questions they thought_ "So that's what she looks like with all the lights on; don't think their ever going to turn off now"._


End file.
